September 13, 2007
Today's conversation: reasons I won't get a massage.
Posted by seed @ 9:08 AM
Me: Sweetie, my back is still killing me. Going to the gym last night was not a good idea...
Wife: Well, I have the name of a good masseuse. I could give it to you.
Me: (thinking to myself - Do I assume this person is a woman? DO NOT SHOW EXCITEMENT) Is she hot? (Look away.)
Wife: ?????
Me: Well, I'd let you watch if she was. You could even...
Wife: (Puppy-dog look of displeasure.)
Me: Would you rather me be rubbed down by a hot chick, alone?
- Pitch-A-Tent Potential (P.T.P.)
- General fear of psuedo-intimate contact with man hands.
- Probability of average to below average looking female specimen coming in close contact with me, as a direct consequence of my own actions; AND P.T.P.
- Remote possibility of the masseuse being totally hot; and P.T.P.
Comments
I've only had one massage and my wife got one, too. There were a few masseese there and the wife got called first by a knockout blonde. After seeing her, I tightened the rubber band under my robe and wondered how to tactfully indicate my preference for the rusty trombone. Unfortunately, my 'soose looked more like Norm from Cheers. *insert humorous slide whistle here*
Seed. Email me. I've got a guy who needs a thing. And he wants a clean one - not one covered with blood and peanut butter, you sicko.
Posted by: billy | September 13, 2007 2:28 PM
Jerry: Okay, so what if it moved?
George: That's the sign! The test; if a man makes it move.
Jerry: That's not the test. Contact is the test, if it moves as a result of
contact.
George: You think it's contact? It has to be touched?
Jerry: That's what a gym teacher once told me.
Posted by: dutch | September 13, 2007 4:38 PM
I've had a few massages, none from hotties though but I've never really worried about popping a towel tent. I don't know why, it just never worried me.
I do have one friend who's a pro but I've never had her work me over. Partly because I think she's gorgeous and very, very sexy.
But the concept of a happy ending massage has always intrigued me, you know, for scientific research purposes only.
Posted by: Erik | September 15, 2007 1:57 PM